by KDMiller | Jan 8, 2019 | Happiness and Well-being, Personal Development
If you always put limit on everything you do, physical or anything else. It will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them.
Bruce Lee
When do you feel strongest mentally? Is it while you’re watching TV?
Probably not.
Most of us feel strongest when we’re being challenged. When our skills are being tested and the goal is just outside our reach, but we believe it’s attainable, we feel strong.
Every step we take moves us closer to conquering the test. Our confidence grows. Our understanding of whatever we’re trying to tackle increases.
We stumble, but we see a breakthrough on the horizon, and it’s not too far. We keep going. This is flow.
It’s timeless.
Will there be plateaus as Bruce Lee said? Yep.
But if you want to experience a greater sense of well-being and happiness, you’ll find ways to reach, and stay in, flow.
by KDMiller | Jan 7, 2019 | Happiness and Well-being
Brian chemicals are
Happiness is fleeting. Many researchers believe we have a set-point for happiness that, of course, varies person-to-person.
If that’s true — if all we can hope for are momentary moments of happiness, then why bother being concerned with it?
Because happiness feels good. It’s also primarily a brain function.
We experience surges of happy chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphins when we do particular activities.
For example, how do you feel after a good workout? Those are endorphins kicking in.
When you cuddle with someone you love, how do you feel? Thank oxytocin for that. It’s sometimes even called the cuddle hormone.
When you accomplish a goal you get a rush of dopamine as a reward. You might even get a hit of serotonin, depending on the goal you accomplished. If it involved exercises like running, biking, or yoga, then BONUS! Oh, and massage, that increases serotonin, too!
The point is, who cares if we have a set-point for happiness when you know there are activities you can do to increase those happy brain chemical experiences?
Get your happy dance on!
by KDMiller | Jan 6, 2019 | Happiness and Well-being
If you think dealing with issues like worthiness and authenticity and vulnerability are not worthwhile because there are more pressing issues, like the bottom line or attendance or standardized test scores, you are sadly, sadly mistaken. It underpins everything.
Brene Brown
What does it mean to be authentic?
Most of us would agree that it means being true to ourselves. True to our values and beliefs.
Which self are we talking about?
Is it the self that we present to our family, friends, colleagues, clients, boss, the people in our church, temple, or other place of worship?
Who is this “self” who is authentic?
When we experience a disconnect between those worlds, our happiness and sense of well-being decreases. We feel off balance.
Until we bring the divide closer, or better still, eliminate it, we’ll continue feeling like a boat pushed by waves without an anchor.
Values are anchors embedded deep in our consciousness. They guide our thoughts and actions.
If we allow them to.
Being authentic means walking your walk. Talking your talk. And doing all of it with conviction.
Can it be scary sometimes?
You bet.
Do we need to do it?
Without a doubt.
by KDMiller | Jan 5, 2019 | Self-Management
“My philosophy is that not only are you responsible for your life, but doing the best at this moment puts you in the best place for the next moment.”
~ Oprah Winfrey
Life isn’t about what others have done to us, and not even what they’ve done for us.
Life is about how we respond to or handle what we perceive others have done to us or for us.
Radical ownership is taking full responsibility for our thoughts, words, and resulting action or inaction.
It’s understanding our values and allowing those values to guide all that we think, say, do, or don’t do.
Is it always easy? Nope.
Will there be times when you want to blame someone for where you are or what’s happening in your life? Yep.
Living your values 100% of the time is a growth process. Sure there are some people who it appears have done this since birth, but that’s rare.
Most of us have to develop over time, learn as we go, fall down, and then pull ourselves back up. If we’re fortunate, though, we’ve surrounded ourselves with people moving in the same direction.
If we’re very fortunate, we have guides who are already living their values.
This is how you can jump-start the process:
- Step 1: Be honest with yourself
- Step 2: Use an assessment to help you uncover your values if you’re struggling to articulate them
- Step 3: Focus on one value each week. Lead and follow with it.
- Step 4: Journal about your values.
How will you take radical ownership of your day today?
by KDMiller | Jan 4, 2019 | Happiness and Well-being
“Nothing is so contagious as an example. We never do great good or great evil without bringing about more of the same on the part of others.”
~ La Rochefoucauld
You’ve had a crappy day. You come home and yell at your spouse for something you know is irrational. She or he snaps at your kids. The kids get annoyed with the dog.
Too cliche?
Maybe, but it’s true.
We need to own our feelings. Emotions are a necessary part of life. They aren’t right or wrong, they just are.
What we can’t do is allow our negative emotions to infect others like cancer. It’s okay to be angry. It’s not okay to express that anger in a way that hurts someone else. It’s awesome to feel joy. Feel free to express that to others — unless joy isn’t where they are in that moment.
Emotions are tricky. Navigating when and where to express them so that others benefit rather than get hurt by them is even trickier.
