Our Choices Matter

by | Happiness and Well-being, Meaning and Purpose

How we begin our morning sets the tone for the rest of our day. 

I could leave this entire article at that, but I won’t. 

A few years ago something happened that upset my apple cart, so to speak. Maybe you’ve experienced a similar feeling.

During the night, I’d feel this churning in the pit of my stomach. Soon it would move to my chest. Breathing would become difficult and I’d wake, gasping for air.

I’d been sleeping the entire time. Imagining. 

Imagining, what? Who knows?

I would awake, gasping to catch a breath. 

This feeling – sensation – stemmed from not making the choices that I knew needed to be made. I know this because once a choice was made, the sensation — the inability to breath, to sleep through the night — stopped. 

What stops us from making the tough choices we need to make so that we not only survive, but thrive? What are we afraid of? 

These are the two questions we need to answer if we hope to find meaning and purpose. People who’ve answered these questions might still fear some things, but they don’t fear making the choices that propel them toward fulfilling their mission.

Finding your one thing is part art, part fearlessness, and a whole lot of simply being willing to make the choices that matter most to our inner voice.

You know that voice. We all do. 

How Happy Were You Last Week?

by | Happiness and Well-being

Happiness is a cocktail. The right mix can do wonders for our sense of well-being. But what is the right mix? And can we be happy all the time?

Being happy is fleeting. It’s one of those feelings that ebbs and flows, so to expect to “be happy” all of the time is unrealistic. 

But, can we be happy more often?

Yes! Here’s the secret sauce (make sure you share this with everyone you meet!)

  • Engage with other people. Really, truly connect with others.
  • That’s it. I know, there’s this other dot, but the secret sauce is this one thing. It’s like what Jack Palance’s character said in City Slickers. 

So, it’s not so much a cocktail. It’s more like a straight-up shot of Tequila without the worm or headache. (And who wants a headache, anyway?) 

Let’s spend a little more time connecting with other people, laughing, crying, and basically being human.

References

Aucubehill (2006, Nov. 15). Finding your one thing. Retrieved December 9, 2018 from https://youtu.be/2k1uOqRb0HU

Berkley Wellness (2018). What is the Science of Happiness? Retrieved December 9, 2018 from http://www.berkeleywellness.com/healthy-mind/mind-body/article/what-science-happiness

Ducharme, J. (2018, Feb. 14). This is the amount of money you need to be happy, according to research. Money. Retrieved December 9, 2018 fromhttp://time.com/money/5157625/ideal-income-study/

Do Good, Feel Good

by | Happiness and Well-being

Doing good holds the power to transform us on the inside, and then ripple out in ever-expanding circles that positively impact the world at large. 

Shari Arison

Do you volunteer your time? Why do you do that? For many of us, we volunteer because there’s a need. And that’s very true. But there’s another reason we do it.

Volunteering, or participating in any good action, makes us feel good. Researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky has studied happiness for years. In her work, she’s identified the association between doing good and feeling good. 

You might be thinking, “Why would anyone need to study that?” Go ahead and google, “how to be happier.” You’re going to get about 149,000,000 results. We’re living in a time when people are working more and (generally) earning more but are less happy.

Lyubomirsky says there are three reasons doing good makes us feel good.

  • When we perform an act of kindness, we feel part of the larger community; we feel part of something bigger than ourselves.
  • Helping others can relieve the guilt we might have when we feel helpless to respond to truly tragic or horrific acts. 
  • Acts of kindness change how we see ourselves.

Being kind to others in whatever shape it takes, gets us out of our own heads. And that can be a very healthy thing. 

A simple way to sum this up is:

Social connection + positive feelings + positive thoughts = feeling good because we’re doing good.

Reference (s)

Lyubomirsky, S (2018). Papers and publications. Retrieved December 8, 2018 from http://sonjalyubomirsky.com/