How do you know when you’re in “the zone?” What does it feel like?
Being “in the zone,” also known as flow in positive psychology research is something most of us has experienced.
Maybe you were focused on a problem at work and suddenly had a breakthrough.
Maybe you were writing and the words began to flow from your mind with little effort.
Experiencing flow or being “in the zone” happens differently for everyone, but there are several key elements these experiences all share.
There’s a balance between the challenge and the skill required.
We’re completely immersed in the task at hand. Our mind isn’t wondering.
We’ve got clearly defined goals
Feedback is immediate and consistent.
We experienced focused concentration.
We have control over what we’re doing.
We’re not self-conscious.
There’s a sense of timelessness.
The activity in intrinsically rewarding.
Flow is the feeling of being completely immersed in an activity that we enjoy. We’re so caught up in the challenge of what we’re doing that we lose track of time.
According to Mihalyi Csikszentmihalyi, the researcher who coined the term, flow, it’s the optimal experience. It’s what we strive for in order to flourish.
Consistent “in the zone” experiences increase our happiness, not hedonic happiness. That kind of happiness has to do with the pursuit of pleasure and the avoidance of pain. That’s not necessarily a bad thing.
But, the kind of happiness I’m talking about fills your entire being. It has to do with meaning and self-realization gained through challenging oneself. The task you’re engaged in stretches you just beyond your skills, but you believe you can accomplish your goal.
In Steve Kotler’s book, The Rise of Superman, he shares 17 triggers that help facilitate getting into flow. They’re divided into four categories.
Psychological (4)
Environmental (3)
Social (9)
Creative (1)
Check out this great slide share explaining each element.
When you think of a “touchstone,” it’s usually a person with whom you can share your deepest desires, hopes, fears, frustrations, and dreams. This is your “go-to” cheerleader/accountability partner.
But what if you don’t have someone in that role?
You need to keep going after your goals and be open to possibilities. While you’re developing yourself, you will begin to gain exposure to more people who can step into this position. But, you need to be vigilant and patient.
Touchstones are your inner circle. They look after you, mentally and sometimes physically. They challenge and uplift you. In colloquial terms, “They’ve got your back.”
So what about worry dolls?
When I was a little girl, I received a small lidded basket filled with tiny worry dolls. I loved them! I knew they were from Guatemala, but that was about all. At the time, I didn’t understand their purpose.
Image credit: Kori D. Miller
Recently, I received a new set (my first has been MIA for many years.) These are like the above picture.
Worry dolls let you leave your worries with them. The legend is that you whisper your worries to them, place them beneath your pillow, and you’ll sleep more soundly.
This is akin to writing your worries in a journal before bed or using worry beads. The bottom line is that you’re freeing your mind so that you are able to sleep. For those who don’t want to try mediation (guided or traditional), this might be a viable option.
It’s important to allow your mind to rest because that’s the time memories are consolidated and learning occurs. Does learning happen other times? Of course, but this is background processing. Magic happens here.
Have you ever gone to bed thinking about a problem, drifted off to sleep and awakened with a solution based on some whacky dream?
That was background processing in action.
The take-way is this: Find a way to free your mind so that you’re able to rest. Do this by,
Meditating
Visualization
Practicing Tai Chi or Yoga before bed
Journaling
Drawing/doodling
Praying
Using worry dolls
Talking with your “touchstone”
None of us live a worry-free life. The important thing is that we learn how to cope with those moments when worry wants to take over and invade our sleep.
Some of you (I hope several, but if not, you’re in for a treat!) might remember the Carol Burnett Show.
This was one of my mother’s favorite sketch comedy shows along with Laugh-In.
As a young kid, I didn’t always appreciate (understand) the humor, but looking back at the above video had me in stitches!
Why?
Because it’s timeless.
Anyone who’s ever traveled via airplane knows what a hassle it is. Anytime a bit of humor can be injected into the situation is appreciated by all, including the flight crew!
The next time you find yourself stranded at an airport, think about Carol Burnett.
Humor can help us navigate just about any stressful event.
Whenever you’re dealing with challenges, cruise over to YouTube and search for: Humor, comedians, or sketch comedy.
You’ll be glad you did!
Your brain will rest easier at night with a little dose of laughter.
Credit: Swancourt via YouTube: Abbott and Costello
When you’re struggling with a problem, one of the best things you can do is find something to laugh about.
Intuitively, we know this is true.
Laughing reduces stress and anxiety. It gets oxygen flowing (especially the BIG belly laughs that make you cry) and “clears” your head.
Laughter frees our mind and pushes whatever we were stuck processing toward the back. Making our previous unfinished task kind of like a silent movie.
We can’t fully focus on two things at once. This splits our attention. But when we’ve been working on a problem and leave it, our brain doesn’t stop “thinking” about it.
How many times have you experienced an “ah, ha!” moment while doing a task completely unrelated to the one you were actually involved in at that moment?
A lot, right?
If you’re not getting enough laughter in your day-to-day, consider making it a habit.
Schedule time to watch funny movies, videos, or go see a comedian. If you can’t manage that, hang out with your kids (or someone else’s if you don’t have your own.) They’re a guaranteed source of laughter!
Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
Jules Renard
It’s probably accurate to say that many of us have moments of laziness. Sometimes it’s because we’ve worked long hours, and still need to help children with homework, get everyone fed, make lunches, and get everyone in bed at a reasonable time.
We do all of that, and then think, “It’s time for me to relax.” Which is another way of saying “veg out,” or be lazy for a while. I get it. I’m fairly certain I wore that t-shirt sometime in the past week.
On the surface, this isn’t a “bad” thing. We do need down time.
But what kind of downtime will benefit our brains and bodies most?
Is it several hours in front of a screen watching Netflix, Hulu, or something else? (Oi, how I love Netflix, and more recently Hulu. I have to limit myself to 1-2 hours for the day or I’ll be up all night.)
Probably not.
All those screen time warnings we see for children and teens apply to us, too.
When we’re engaged with our screens, we’re disconnecting with the people around us. We are social creatures who need contact. That contact can come from engagement via our devices, but it’s certainly not ideal.
Ask anyone whose been deployed how ideal that is. Or, someone who travels for their living. That type of connection is their “lifeline” to their most important people, but it’s not even close to an acceptable replacement.
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